resounding questions

I promise I have not entirely given up on blogging for the month of December but things have just been so crazy around here the past few days. I spent most of today hanging out with people and packing/organizing. Today we found some seriously moldy bread and I had the realization that I have not one, but two tripods under my bed. I'd call that slightly unnecessary. Other things we found included a basketball, a small christmas tree, and several books that the bookstore refused to buy back from me. Bummer.

I'm still so far behind on Reverb but I'll answer one question tonight in hopes of not falling further behind. I'm sure it'll be a short one as we're watching a movie right now by the light of our newly located small Christmas tree. So festive. :)

The prompt: What questions did you ask?

I think that over and over again, the biggest question I asked consistently this year was: "...What??"

See, that's the way I feel sometimes when I hear the Lord speak or when He begins to do something in my life. Sometimes I ask in confusion, sometimes in doubt... sometimes it manifests itself into the question "Is this real life?", but generally it all boils back down to "...what?". I asked that question with excitement when I first found out I'd get to be Assistant Director. I asked it with sincere, surprised confusion when I was asked to direct. I asked it with disbelief when I began to realize Daniel liked me. I asked it in hopes of direction when I was offered this internship in Mississippi. I asked it countless time when ridiculous things would happen over the summer. I ask it daily at the craziness that happens in our apartment. I even asked it with excited confusion when the 8 inches of snow began to fall last January. 

I think we all ask this question. We ask the question in hopes that we will gain clarity and sometimes in hopes that the Lord will just comply to our timeline and tell us what's going on. I'm often so desperate to just know the future or to have the Lord speak to me in the way that I can understand without a shadow of a doubt. Sometimes He does just that, but often times the reason He doesn't is because it's the unknown that causes us to rely fully on Him. If I could write my own ending to my story, I'd like to think that I know bits and pieces of what I would include. But the beautiful truth is that the Lord knows our hearts so much better than even we do. I believe that is why He let's me ask "what?". All throughout scripture Jesus speaks in parables and tales that leave His followers begging for clarity. Often times, however, the answer is as simple as what it right in front of them. That's the way it's been in my life this year too.

I've found that all year if my question has been a continual "what?", His answer has always been a resounding "Believe.". That's really all there is to it. Believe. Trust Him. Have faith in what He is doing and continue to seek His voice. He'll tell you-- He'll provide direction and clarity all in due time. That's what the answer boiled down to in most of Jesus' parables as well. They are often the simple call to just believe and trust Him with faith like a child. I wonder if I will ever cease to need that reminder. 

I'll pick back up on the blogging very soon, but right now I'm struggling to concentrate as this movie unfolds in the background. Maybe tomorrow? Definitely soon.