chapters

It's weekends like this one that I'm reminded how incredibly beautiful my life here in Mississippi is. The best word I can describe for these days is idyllic. I sit at the end of them and wonder how I ever got to be so blessed.

I love everything about life here.

I love the sunshine and afternoons by the lake. I love that I have the sweetest church family I could ever have dreamed of-- one that makes me laugh constantly, pushes me to grow, and cries sweet tears as I cry them too. I love lazy afternoons with the boy who melts my heart far more than is safe to say. I love every minute of just living life together-- reading books, sitting by the pool, playing tennis, and laughing til we both can't breathe. I am blessed beyond all measure every single day.

The Lord answered my cries for friendship as I moved here in such a mighty way. This place is home. These people are family. I'm so blessed by this time and so grateful for this chapter of my life. I'm holding tight to every single second of it.

Because that's just what it is... a beautiful chapter. One far greater than I could have written myself.

But chapters come to an end and pages get turned. I admit that I can't understand why this one has to close. I admit that I'm not ready for it. Not in the least. The heavy realization of it brings hot tears to my eyes this afternoon...

I've accepted my dream job, working at the LifeWay office in Nashville next year. I get to live the dream of so many CK staffers-- working on camp all year round. I've secretly dreamed of this for years and I'm so flattered to have been offered the position. I'm brimming with excitement, yes, but right now I just need someone to push me off the edge and into the water. I know I'm going to love it when I get there. Leaving here may be hands down the hardest thing I've ever been called to do, but I know with full assurance that if I'm going to be faithful to the promise I made the Lord a long time ago, that is was Him that I would follow first and foremost, no matter the cost, then I have to go.

I have to go.

Because the Lord's plans are better than mine, even if I can't see it today. I believe that to be true, one hundred percent.

But today all I wish for more hours in the sunshine, more evenings listening to sweet friends play music, more time just living life together... more girls nights, more Sunday School, and more of the family that I know loves me so much here. More of home. Today I'm realizing that I'll miss Sunday lunches and time laughing with kids and all the things I love every day about being here. I'll miss the accountability I've built, though I know I'll take those relationships with me in the days to come. I cried uncontrollably at the realization today that I'll miss another soccer season. I'll miss being twenty minutes away from Daniel and getting to laugh together almost every single day. I'll miss this idyllic life the Lord has gifted me with during this time. I love it.

And so I'm scared, yes. But don't hear me say that I'm not excited. If there's one thing I know to be true, it's that in the morning when I wake up, the Lord will still be good. Every single day. I've seen His goodness and I know His provision. I know He has a mighty purpose for me in this next chapter and with that in mind, I'm excited to allow Him to turn the page. I'm grasping on to all that today holds and I ask that you join me as I pray for trusting Him with tomorrow. The days aren't mine to hold anyway. He is good. He is in control.

Praise God for who He is. Yesterday, today, and tomorrow. He did all He did simply to redeem us, that we might be able to walk in His presence once more. And walk I will. Humbly, boldly, not knowing where the path may lead, but trusting as I take my next step. Psalm 37:23, right? It's my constant prayer for my life.


Where You go, I'll go. Where You stay, I'll stay. When You move, I'll move. I will follow You.