pieces

Well gang, while it's far past my bed time I just want to take a minute to post. This past week of camp was incredible. Every now and then a week comes along where you just know from opening celebration forward that it's going to be incredible. This was one of those weeks. The energy was unceasing and the decisions leave me speechless. This may have been a small week of camp (only 214 kids) but it was a mighty one, one that will impact lives for a long time to come. We had about 40 decisions this week and everywhere you look kids were talking with staffers and adults about who Christ is and what that means for our lives. There were even countless stories of kids leading other kids to Christ-- in their dorms, in their church groups, even in the ice cream line. Anointing. We prayer walked Millsaps the night before it began and the Lord heard our prayers in a mighty, mighty way.

But believe it or not, camp isn't all of what I wanted to blog about tonight. I know, shocker. It's funny how consumed in the camp world we can become so instantly...

This morning the Lord spoke to my heart as I read through Hebrews 10, specifically verses 19-25:

Therefore, brothers and sisters, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body,  and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water.  Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.  And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

For the sake of time as well as the honesty of where this passage hit me this morning, I'm going to again do something that I don't do often and share the words straight out of my journal from this morning. They are as follows:

"Brokenness allows us to come closer to God. Verse 20 talks about us having access to God now since the body was broken, just like the curtain was torn. The curtain was what kept the people from the Holy of Holies and it ripped upon Christ's death, allowing full access. Just as the curtain broke, Jesus Himself also broke to allow access. That physical brokenness closed the gap between us and God. In looking at these two pictures of brokenness, is it any wonder then that the brokenness in our lives is what seems to help us draw the most near to Christ? Makes sense to me. Maybe this is why I have been yearning so desperately for brokenness lately. It's not that I want to lose hold of anything I've been given, I just recognize the extreme beauty in desperation, in those times when you can physically do nothing but cry out to the Lord-- when you can't even make words and just have to let the Spirit interpret your groaning and weeping. No wonder brokenness is so beautiful. It's a direct picture of Christ. Let us be broken as we hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful."

There is a ton of brokenness on my staff. We come across so much brokenness in our campers each week. Life throws us hard situations and I always go back to what Weston says to our kids each week-- it wasn't supposed to be this way. We are made to walk whole with God in the garden, but life is continually getting in our way. My heart is heavy and I don't think I'll understand why some people live the life of Job each and every day. But I do know this-- when we have nothing left is when God tends to show us who He is the most. I think it's just because our eyes are open wider in those times. The Lord worked on my heart last year about how we live desperately when everything in our lives is beautiful. It was an interesting lesson to learn... I'm still not sure I've got it fully down. And yes, everything in my own life right now is pretty beautiful. Not perfect, but full of blessings none the less. May I pray desperately and live with the eyes of the broken regardless, giving thanks for the blessings, holding nothing too closely, and living out eucharisto.

I'll try...

It's far later than any good staffer should be up so I'm off to bed. I'll leave behind a picture or 4 from the week. I'm pretty crazy about these guys... #ck3